My name is Nikki.
I will keep my background simple for the moment because I don’t want to scare people away. My childhood was pretty normal for the most part. I was adopted at birth. I know this because it was engraved into my head from the second I had ears. I had 2 older brothers that were also adopted from separate families. We were raised in a Catholic family and even went to Catholic school for a couple years. We did things your typical family would do. Us kids played outside until my mom yelled for dinner. We threw food under the table that we didn’t want. We even went out to eat after church on Sunday mornings.
Things took a drastic turn when I was about 10 which I will always blame on my parents buying their first microwave. I thought I was a Hellion as an adolescent and teenager but after many years of people watching I’m not too sure on that anymore. My ” Hellion” days lasted a very short time because when I was 17 it seemed only natural to have my first child. I mean who wants to fight genetics.
That whole chapter of my life turned out exactly as you would expect. My high school principal encouraged me to quit.(which I did not) The boy split. I missed out on the rest of my childhood because all I did was work. Blah Blah Blah…..
My hubby and I were both born and raised in the same small town outside of Chicago. No one really understands where we came from unless you grew up there. We married pretty young and didn’t stand a chance in hell, however we just celebratde our 12th Anniversary, AND are already planning what we want to do for our 15th. So, I would say we are doing pretty good! I changed him, he changed me, the kids changed us. Together, we have been through hell and no one can ever take that away from us.
We moved to Texas together 7 years ago and have never really looked back. Our marriage, our lives, and our kids lives are better here. Period. So, we are officially Yankees’s turned Southern and have adjusted quite nicely.
My oldest daughter ” Thing 1″ just turned 17. She thinks she is 25. Need I say more…..
Like every teenager in America Thing 1 thinks her life is very terrible because her parents have rules and enforce them. I will admit that I’m pretty strict. If The Worlds Strictest Parents had a competition I would be a runner up for sure. I have these rules because she needs them. She is definitely her mothers daughter. I know that one day she will appreciate that I love her so much that I even had these rules in the first place.
Thing 1 is smart, beautiful, athletic, and much more controllable than I ever was. (different mother = different kid)
She will do great things because I expect it from her. (Yes, that really works) I expect it from her because I know she is capable. I am very proud of the young lady she is becoming. Her success and happiness will be my first big accomplishment!
Thing 2 is my very rambunctious 11 year old son. If I had to explain Thing 2 in a few short words they would be: animated, sensitive, smart.
Thing 2 is so smart I wonder all the time how it is possible I made him. There is no doubt in my mind he will be the creator of something amazing someday. He will argue until his idea sells and will not take no for an answer.
Thing 2 has severe adHd which means he can be pretty impulsive sometimes. I am very lucky that his impulsivity usually stops with his mouth but that means his mouth really has no filter. He wears his heart in his sleeve and is very sensitive to how other people treat him. Thing 2 also has mild OCD. He is very particular about what kind of cheese he eats and what kind of toilet paper he uses , but we are working really hard to teach him not to sweat the small stuff.
A lot of people would say Thing 2 has Aspergers. I say he is my son.
Every mother should have a son like Thing 2.
My youngest daughter Thing 3 just turned 10!
Every one of my kids changed my life but Thing 3 changed ME. She changed all of us. She changed the way we see the world around us. We look at things from a totally different angle and can thank her for that. She changed the way our family is run.
Thing 3 was born with a cyst on her brain and has a chromosome abnormality. She struggles to do every day things we regularly take for granted. Over the years she has been labeled so many times I lost count. I have also lost count of the amount of times we’ve heard she may never get better. Thing 3 has the cognitive ability of a 4-5 year old but she is still progressing daily just at a slow rate. She proved many people wrong the day she took her first steps and the moment she spoke her first word. (Cool! when she was 6) While I agree she still has a very tough road ahead of her I do not think she is anywhere near finished proving people wrong.
Thing 3 lives in a world that I wish I could live in. She does not dislike anyone. She has no idea what it means to bully someone. She does not hurt. She does not judge. She only loves. She is happy 99% of the time UNLESS you take her to the doctor, and that really pisses her off!
Some of her diagnoses are: adHd, global development delay, pdd, aspergers, Sensory integration dysfunction, speech delay & Apraxia, cysts on brain, and gain on her #15 Chromosome. As of May 2012 we are also currently in the middle of a Metabolic work up for her so, anyone that has info for me to read please pass it along. I will read every piece of it. I finally feel like we may be finding the root of her issues and I am very hopeful!!
(Update: We are now fully emerged into the world of Mitochondrial Disease. It’s been ugly so far and it’s making my angry as hell but, I’m hopeful there are brighter days in the near future.)
So if you have a child with special needs: I GET IT!
I have felt the heartache. I have done the research. I have felt the joy and the overwhelming amount of fear. I get it.
So basically, I am an adopted child. I was a teenage mother. I am currently the mother of a teen. I have 1 daughter with special needs and a son that’s in between. All of those worlds seem so far apart but for me they are merged together. I am a psychiatrists dream. I am finally learning how to find some humor in our situation and will kick the shit out of anyone that tries to take that away from me!
There’s really no sugar coating here.
Welcome to my crazy life…sit back and hopefully enjoy a laugh or two with me!
These are the true stories from my life as I survive Motherhood one defective day at a time!