I Fought “Little Miss Monday”…..

The time is 9:36.  I am just now walking in the door from dropping my last child off at school.  Late.
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I tried to think of an excusable reason for the sign in sheets at the front office but, I got nothing here.  If I was being honest I would have wrote:

REASON: Because the year is 2013 and I haven’t slept since 1995.

We obviously woke up before 9:30 but, I decided we woke up “late enough” to take our sweet ass time.  Thing 1 must’ve been thinking just like me because she came in my room at 6:55 to tell me her ride was running late and when the rest of us finally made it downstairs there was pancakes in the microwave for Thing 2 & 3!  That wasn’t until 8:00……..

My youngest starts school at 8:05.

Screw it.

dysfunctionaldose.com

dysfunctionaldose.com

(Even Tubbs who thinks it’s acceptable to bark in my face at 7am on a Saturday Morning didn’t want to face this morning.)

There is no reason why I should have to run around like a lunatic to attempt being less late than we already are.  We’re already not going to make it on time and I will get a “Shame on Mommy” tardy email to prove it so, I’m thinking some sunny side up eggs, pancakes, and a large side of sausage sounds like the right thing to do at this point!

(For the record here…  There is NO reason to send me a “tardy to school” email.  My kids don’t drive you a**holes.  Obviously, I know they were late.)

At least that’s how I feel about the younger two kids.  Now, if we were in the exact same scenario for the oldest child I would say:

“Sorry Honey, no breakfast for you today.  Junior year is future planning stage and there’s no way I’m letting you fall behind in class just to take a chance you’ll be living in my basement until your 40!  ON YOUR FEET CHILD….MOVE….FASTER….FASTER!”

If you are a Mother of 1 or a Mother with 5 years or less experience you might be asking yourself how a responsible Mother reaches the point of this type of attitude……

It’s very simple really.  You see..

None of this is my fault.  I tried to fight the Monday morning curse for many years.  It just so happens that the “Little Miss Monday Morning” that shows up at my door is a filthy wh*re and her claws are just a little sharper than mine.

I think of it like this:

I AM being a good Mom.  I taught my kids a very valuable lesson this morning.  Every child needs to learn how to be a good sport.  Little Miss Monday Morning  was tougher than me this morning. She played harder. That’s okay though.  Better luck next time! ;)

Oh..Yeah….

Dear Little Miss Monday

If you were looking for a more traditional way to teach responsibility don’t worry I’ve got that covered with this guest post!  Have you entered the Premama Giveaway yet?  Hurry..before it’s too late!

Thanks so much for stopping by today Friends and have a great day!

 


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  • http://dysfunctionaldose.com/ Nikki

    Lol, thanks! Glad I’m not the only one who felt it was appropriate to take it slow………

  • Jennifer

    Sounds like my kind of morning! I love the :little miss Monday morning” title! :)

  • http://dysfunctionaldose.com/ Nikki

    I have actually missed appointments because Tanner ties me up with his arguing AFTER he refused to get out of bed for an hour…..the girls are not my morning problem! It’s that boy of mine. He got Mommy’s ugly morning genes!

  • http://dysfunctionaldose.com/ Nikki

    I had to come up with a nickname for the B*tch because we have such a dramatic relationship!

  • AnnMarie

    I hate the mornings. I have my foot in Nico’s behind the entire time trying to get him out the door on time and it’s my daughter half of the twins that keeps the bus waiting. Hate mornings.

  • tiffani goff

    Too funny, I have never heard of any refer to hideous Mondays as “Little Miss Monday Morning.” Gonna have to steal that! xoxo tiffani

  • http://dysfunctionaldose.com/ Nikki

    So glad you liked and it made you laugh! Tubbs is my biggest baby weighing in at almost 200 pounds. He is the best behaved child I have!

  • http://www.facebook.com/teri.ortiz Teri Ortiz

    LMM was at my house tooo….the bitch… Hahahaha!!! And my thing 1 had the f’n nerve to text me just after leaving the house (with the lunch I packed her in her 16 yr old hand) and say…let me quote “why don’t you pack me breakfast? You can at least put pop tarts or a muffin in here”… Really???? Yea….

  • http://TheDoseofReality.com/ The Dose of Reality

    Hahahahaha!! PERFECT post for a Monday morning!! You were bested this time, but you’ll get her next time!! :)

    Also…I thought at first that had to be a stock photo of the perfect sleepy dog because it was so perfect! Then to read and see that it’s your dog…and his name is TUBBS….which is just so awesome….well, between the laughs and the adorable Tubbs, my Monday morning is made!! Thank you!! –Lisa