The time is 9:36. I am just now walking in the door from dropping my last child off at school. Late.
I tried to think of an excusable reason for the sign in sheets at the front office but, I got nothing here. If I was being honest I would have wrote:
REASON: Because the year is 2013 and I haven’t slept since 1995.
We obviously woke up before 9:30 but, I decided we woke up “late enough” to take our sweet ass time. Thing 1 must’ve been thinking just like me because she came in my room at 6:55 to tell me her ride was running late and when the rest of us finally made it downstairs there was pancakes in the microwave for Thing 2 & 3! That wasn’t until 8:00……..
My youngest starts school at 8:05.
Screw it.
dysfunctionaldose.com
(Even Tubbs who thinks it’s acceptable to bark in my face at 7am on a Saturday Morning didn’t want to face this morning.)
There is no reason why I should have to run around like a lunatic to attempt being less late than we already are. We’re already not going to make it on time and I will get a “Shame on Mommy” tardy email to prove it so, I’m thinking some sunny side up eggs, pancakes, and a large side of sausage sounds like the right thing to do at this point!
(For the record here… There is NO reason to send me a “tardy to school” email. My kids don’t drive you a**holes. Obviously, I know they were late.)
At least that’s how I feel about the younger two kids. Now, if we were in the exact same scenario for the oldest child I would say:
“Sorry Honey, no breakfast for you today. Junior year is future planning stage and there’s no way I’m letting you fall behind in class just to take a chance you’ll be living in my basement until your 40! ON YOUR FEET CHILD….MOVE….FASTER….FASTER!”
If you are a Mother of 1 or a Mother with 5 years or less experience you might be asking yourself how a responsible Mother reaches the point of this type of attitude……
It’s very simple really. You see..
None of this is my fault. I tried to fight the Monday morning curse for many years. It just so happens that the “Little Miss Monday Morning” that shows up at my door is a filthy wh*re and her claws are just a little sharper than mine.
I think of it like this:
I AM being a good Mom. I taught my kids a very valuable lesson this morning. Every child needs to learn how to be a good sport. Little Miss Monday Morning was tougher than me this morning. She played harder. That’s okay though. Better luck next time! 
Oh..Yeah….
If you were looking for a more traditional way to teach responsibility don’t worry I’ve got that covered with this guest post! Have you entered the Premama Giveaway yet? Hurry..before it’s too late!
Thanks so much for stopping by today Friends and have a great day!
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